Articulated Discussion All posts by drnightmare

3/16/2010Review - DC Universe Classics Wave 6 - Superman (Classic)

There's something most of the world's population seems to not understand, and no it's not how to stay out of debt, it's that rocking a mullet is simply the epitome of what it is to be cool. I hear your snarky remarks, "Then why don't YOU have one?" Though I appreciate you thinking I'm the epitome of all that is manly and amazing, I am simply not cool enough to wear one. It takes a man of dicipline and sterner stuff to not only maintain such an iconic hairstyle, but also to stand steadfast against the putrid tide of jealous libel and slander spread by those who can never be awesome enough to wear this most honorific of hairdos.

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Author: DrNightmare

2/23/2010Review - Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull - Mutt Williams

Names are funny things. Some people like to play jokes on their future generations by requesting that all males in the family carry the name of "Josonabich". They will plead with you to name your children this way, they will make grand claims of it being a prized and honored tradition. Do not believe these people. Instead, use it against them. At the next barbeque, request they bring lots of food, and if they complain in even the smallest way, remind them of how proud you will be to name your child, Josonovich. And then, when the time comes to name the kid, name it Luscious. Stud Luscious. Stud Lucious Jr. Now that kid is gonna be a winner!

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Author: DrNightmare

2/13/2010Review - GI Joe 25th Anniversary - Viper

What's an army without some badass uniforms? Just a bunch of dudes with guns. Weapons alone aren't enough to conquer a country, you need a symbol, an image the masses can learn to fear as you smash it into their faces with the butt of your rifle and the edge of your blade.

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Author: DrNightmare

2/6/2010Plastic Ponderings - A Distant Rumble

It begins with the sound of splintering wood, echoing throughout a warehouse's darkest chambers. The groan muffled by the very crates housed within them. There is a faint shriek, whether of fear or elation, either would be appropriate upon sight of any of the contents shackled within these containers...

Plastic Ponderings

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Author: DrNightmare

2/5/2010Review - CobraStickers.com - "Cobra Command" Chest Emblems (Red & Silver)

We live in a world fueled by aggressive advertising, where magazines spray perfume in your eyes and billboards practically reach-out and strangle the cash out of you. COBRA knows this, and has begun spreading its venom through these channels as well. The future of our beloved terrorist organization will not be assured by the nefarious use of advanced nanomite technology; it will be guaranteed by stickers, shining like blood trickling from a wound, as sharp as the fangs that produced it.    

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Author: DrNightmare

1/18/2010Take Our Word For It - The Reviewer's Role

It's a mystery why some toys, despite being so interesting, seemingly are completely ignored by the toy-community. For example, why isn't there as much buzz about LEGOs as there is about DCUC figures? And are we, as reviewers, partly at fault when a great toy-line goes under for not covering it enough? What is our role in this community, exactly? AD asks that hard question to some of the most well-known reviewers around, along with a few other questions with the soft, gooey, consistency of smashed Madballs. 

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Author: DrNightmare

1/16/2010One Shots #9

[TAO's Note: It's all warnings, compliments, and insults in this Green Lantern filled edition of everyone's favorite continuity free comic series.]

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Author: DrNightmare

1/13/2010Review - Charmed Series 2 - Leo

A wise man once said a castle without an army is like a hive without the bees, a tempting target seen from outside, but with no honey inside to eat. So, what, did he go around licking empty castle's walls? What the hell was he talking about? I digress. What does make sense is buying all the Charmed action figures to display in all their half-naked glory. Even Leo, poor mascara-wearing hen-pecked Leo.

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Author: DrNightmare

1/8/2010One Shots #8

[TAO's Note: Don't worry! The numbering doesn't mean you're behind if you missed the first 7 editions. DrNightmare brings us another entertaining and continuity-free edition of AD's bonus comic series:]

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Author: DrNightmare

1/7/2010Scalped! An Interview with the Enemy

More often than toy-collectors would like, we find ourselves staring at row after row of lame characters on the pegs. And though we like to blame poor distribution and uninteresting character-choices, we can also add scalpers to that black list. They are a twisting thorn in our collective sides, it's bad enough that there will only be one Raven for every 10 cases of DCUC, but there is always a scalper somewhere willing to make you suffer even more. But is this pain justified? Can it be justified, much like war? Join us as we probe the brains of two successful scalpers, doing what they do best for different reasons. 

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Author: DrNightmare

1/5/2010An Interview with John Harmon of Mint Condition

[TAO's Note: John Harmon may very well be the man of my dreams. He not only customizes action figures with the best of them, but he's also the fellow behind popular webcomic and regular must-read: Mint Condition. DrNightmare steps inside his brain for a few questions about toys, comics, superheroes, and war wounds. So don't skip this one, you might just miss out on true love.]

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Author: DrNightmare

1/4/2010Review - Justice - Batgirl

Fire in the sky, can't you see that all my castles are burning? Fire in the sky, won't you help me now my castles are burning. Trapped within the crumbling walls, your naked flame spurs me on. I think that's how the song goes...anyway, when lyrics from the Prince of Darkness himself are weaved into a review, you know the figure has got to be good.

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Author: DrNightmare

1/3/2010The Articulated Accolades - Day 3

[TAO's Note: I can guarantee that this one will surprise you. DrNightmare takes a step in a direction no one ever expected, and awards his one and only Articulated Accolade to a ...resin toy? There are no red-head or babes inside. Keep reading if you're as confused as I am, because he presents a pretty convincing argument.] 

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Author: DrNightmare

12/30/2009One Shots #7

[TAO's Note: You should keep reading, because who would you be if you missed the decade's last installment of:]

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Author: DrNightmare

12/26/2009Review - CTGLinks DisPLAYability - Vinylz Series Display

Unless you live in the streets and pose your toys in a real-life city environment (alongside bindles, burning cans, and underneath bridges and such), then you probably need a little something to liven up your display shelf. The Vinylz Series Display from CTGLinks probably isn't what you're looking for. Read on to find all about it, as DrNightmare tries his best to convince you that living on the streets might not be so bad afterall. 

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Author: DrNightmare