It's the rise of the bootlegs in this "late-breaking" edition of AD's weekly look at the worst toys on the planet. I hope Skynet doesn't find this one, because if my mockery of these terrible Terminators is discovered, I may be in trouble. These plastic abberrations come courtesy of the eternally-entertaining The Undiscovered Playthings bootleg action figure blog.
It's almost unbelievable what Hot Toys can do with plastic, a point that's perfectly captured in their recent Terminator: Salvation high-end 12 inch figures. It's even more unbelievable what bootleggers can do with plastic, a point that's perfectly captured in the image below. After seeing these figures, it's quite apparent that Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines is a true horror masterpiece. Just try to take more than a glance at the female Terminator on the right. *shudders*
It seems someone at the Skynet factory accidentally placed an adolescent boy's head on the female body. His/her big ears, arched brows, and puppy eyes only cofirm those suspicions. I suppose if you're trying to create an unthreatening robot that can earn a victim's trust before attacking, a youthful transvestite is as good a choice as any other. Of course, the mangled metal arm might be a warning for some more astute individuals. Arnold there in the middle doesn't look quite so bad. He's got some decent sculpting, somewhat human proportions (unlike Peter Panty over there), and some kind of weapon. I do think that if you removed his gun, you'd have a perfect dancing Arnold toy. The body positioning is perfect for nightclub Schwarzenegger, and he might even look natural alongside his robot buddy, skanking up the dance floor all night.
And here we have two even funnier bootleg toys. First is another rendition of Arnold, missing arm and all. Few people actually know that the Governor lost his arm during the filiming of Terminator 3, but the bootleggers made sure to get that little detail exactly right. Even fewer people know that he then underwent multiple surgeries to attach his severed arm to his knee. You'll notice that detail is also captured in a perfect rendition here. The bootleggers definitely left no detail unturned, and they deserve the credit for it. And then there is the the smile on our friend to the right, which is absolutely priceless. For just $3 a day, you could bring a smile like this to a poor, crippled robot's face. Don't you want to see him smile?
There are even more pictures of these travesties over at The Undiscovered Playthings bootleg action figure blog!
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Want to see even more bootleg toys? Find past and future editions of Bootleg Tuesday right here.
