Transformers fans and bootleg aficionados will no doubt remember the Space Warriors: Transformable Beast-Tech Fighter line of bootlegs. Spanning various size classes, price points, and even Transformers sublines, it was one of the main sources of wacky TF knockoffs (and the line that birthed the excellent Gigatron bootleg we looked at recently). Moreover, until Hasbro put an end to those shenanigans and made Big Lots the nation's number one reseller of repackaged scout and legends figures from several years ago -- at twice the price that nobody wanted to pay for them when they were new -- they could be found in abundance on the pegs of a legitimate retailer. Alas, now you'll have to brave the clutter of Tuesday Morning for even a glimpse of these beasts... or you could just keep reading our Bootleg Tuesday feature, 'cause I've got a bunch of these suckers and will no doubt be sharing more of them as time passes. That's your cue to click the link below!
As suggested above, one of the cool things about the Space Warriors: Transformable Beast-Tech Fighter line was just how diverse its offerings were. If you wanted Beast Wars knockoffs, you could find 'em. Massive Robots in Disguise figures? Yup. Heck, there were even knockoffs of figures that were never released to the US market! Today's spotlighted figure -- a bootleg of Heinrad from Beast Wars Neo -- is one of those.
Heinrad had one of the more unusual alternate modes for a Transformer -- not only was he a tanuki, but he was also an alarm clock. The original toy actually served that function (though apparently not in tanuki mode), with a real working clock in its belly and the ability to activate/deactivate the alarm by pulling up or pushing down on the robot's head. Of course, as a $5 bootleg, this Heinrad doesn't have any of that fancy stuff -- instead, his belly is solid and sports a yin/yang sticker in place of the clock.
The figure is otherwise largely faithful to the original version, though... with one exception. See, apparently tanuki are known for having really large testicles, to the point that I once saw clips of an anime in which they use their horrifically oversized nutsacks to beat the living hell out of people. The original Heinrad figure's scrotum was hardly so large -- whether that's a necessity of the engineering or due to parental concerns about a kid having a toy with giant balls I cannot say (but it's probably not the latter; this is Japan we're talking about) -- but it was still a scrotum. The knockoff takes things further by coloring the "testicles" white and giving them red glowing surfaces, which, depending upon how you look at it, makes them not testicles at all or horrifying robotic testicles filled with red laser sperm. Whatever the case, this change makes children less likely to lick them -- undoubtedly a good thing considering that the paint used on knockoffs is a curious mixture of molten lead and asbestos with food coloring.
And curving away from Nightmare Lane, here is Heinrad in his much less potentially terrifying robot form! Again, this is mostly faithful to the original version, the main change (in addition to the lack of the clock) being the cost-cutting measure of including the goggles in the head mold rather than having them as a separate, adjustable piece. The tanuki mode's accessories -- a wine jug and a book of IOUs (tanukis are drunks and cheats and therefore awesome) -- even convert to a blaster, just like those of the legitimate Japanese version! Except... he can't hold the blaster because the sculpting of his right hand doesn't allow for it. Come to think of it, that right hand looks kinda strange...
OMG, it's not a right hand.
My bootleg Heinrad has two left hands.
WHOSE RESPONSIBLE THIS?!?!?!?!?
When I first realized that upon getting the thing home, I wanted to take it back to Big Lots to return or exchange it. I mean, it's got two left hands! That kind of thing just isn't supposed to happen. But then I thought about how I'd respond to someone complaining to me about quality control on a bootleg toy... and, well, here he is several years later. Incidentally, I did end up buying another one with proper left and right hands during my next visit to Big Lots (from the looks of things, the sculpt still doesn't allow him to hold the blaster), but then I decided I didn't care that much about it and never opened it. It's there, though, if I ever end up watching Beast Wars Neo and develop an affection for that loveable tanuki-clock-thingy with visible testicles and two different hands!
Obviously, I can't give Bootleg Heinrad a glowing review, but for what it was -- a readily available knockoff of a Japan-only Transformer with testicles of doom for $5 -- it was pretty nifty.
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Want to see even more bootleg toys? Find past and future editions of Bootleg Tuesday right here.
