Do you know why DC Infinite Heroes are named that? Because they are a seemingly endless horde clogging up all the retail space on the shelv- oh, TAO already made this joke, damn. Uh, hey, do big muscular dudes with tiny legs make you laugh? How about guys in tights wearing wings? Well, this figure has all of the above and could still kick your ass, find-out just how badly by reading the review!
Name: Hawkman
Line: DC Infinite Heroes, Crisis Series, Three Pack 6
Manufacturer: Mattel
Released: 2009
Price: Retail: $6.99-$8.99, Online; $9.99-$15.99
Scale: 3.75 in. (figure is about 3.75 in. tall)
Accessories: None (Do tumors count as accessories?)
Sponsor Listings: Amazon-$9.99
Just how much gratuitous muscle is enough? When it comes to Hawkman, it's never enough! But on closer inspection, this beefcake may have been baked with a little too much meat. I handed this figure over to a friend who is studying to be a paramedic and he couldn't even identify some of the muscles on this figure. To which I replied Hawk-muscles, baby! Wooooo! This is a pretty and ugly toy at the same time, the orginal butt-kicking idea is there, but the sculptor flubbed-up big time on this one. And it's almost unforgivable, I mean, how can you mess-up Hawkman!? He's muscle and hair and sexy rolled into one, that's only three things to keep track of! Oh yeah, and pants, but conveniently they didn't forget those! PFFT! It's like messing-up Conan, he's a big manly dude in a loincloth, are you gonna make him short, bald, and pimple-faced? NO! But that's what happened here, Katar Hol got shafted by the Mace if Suckiness. Hol is about 3.75 inches tall, which is a slap in the face considering many of the other figures in this line are over 4 inches! I mean, even Spiderman is bigger than he is!...oh, that's a different toy-line isn't it?...did I just rant-on blindly for an entire paragraph?...oops!
When compared to a female DCIH figure (PowerGirl is the only one I have), Carter has approproate height, but still has the sick proportions. The shoulders are a mile wide, the head is puny, and the hands are as big as oven mitts! How can so many things go wrong? Isn't there anyone checking these figures during development to say, Hey! That looks stupid! Fix it! But hey, he has a belt with mystery-pods and pouches, there's gotta be something cool in those! I like the overall design of this figure, the added details on the harness and belt break the blandness of what would otherwise be just a guy in spandex. The bony talons on the boots are raised and add some more eye-candy. The wings aren't hyper-detailed, but they still look awesome, though I thought they'd be poseable (they're not, just glued-on). Love the face, stern and commanding chin, the mask even has a few creases. Technically, you could remove the harness along with the wings because they're all one piece, simply glued-on, but they'll leave a DCUC-ish hole in the back.
Sculpt Score: 7 / 10
Ha ha, the Hawk-symbol on the chest looks more like a baby dinosaur or a zombie-unicorn, there are some much keener designs out there, no idea why Mattel settled for this lame duck. The flesh is cast with a matte finish, there's nothing glossy on this figure actually, great for more realism. Other bits are decently-painted, the whole figure could use some dry-brushing though, especially the wings and straps. The mask has a golden sheen, much more appealing than nasty dull gold paint.
Paint Score: 8 / 10
Not bad for such a small figure, the articulation is sturdy is not plentiful. Everything works like it should, though I don't understand why the neck is a swivel instead of a ball-joint. The wings could stand to be poseable, but that might have made the figure too expensive to make. Even though the hands are slightly-open fists, there are no acessories to stick in there *sad-face*. Knees and elbows bend 90-degrees, the swivel hips don't add much dynamicallity. Dynamicism? Yeah, that thing. At least the articulation isn't too notoceable.
Articulation Score: 7 / 10
Hawkman is like the cool uncle with a narly colection of crazy weapons every kid wants to have. Come on kids, it's time to visit Uncle Carter in his castle full of axes and torches and sexy Redheads with wings! No, screw it, you kids stay here with Mom and make sure she doesn't follow me. This figure comes in a 3-pack with two Hawk-groupies, but sadly no accessories to bash stuff with. The hands look like they want to grip something, so put something in there! Carter could always use those massive fists to knockdown a building or smash a tank instead.
Fun Score: 7 / 10
Believe it or not, this is one of the best DCIH figure made to date, sad, huh? These figures aren't meant to be awesome, they're just meant to be mini-mes, useless throwaway figures to decorate your cubicle with (at least that's the impression I get from these figs). They cost what other, better action figures cost though, and that's a head-scratcher. It's almost like Mattel thought people would assume these are good toys if they charged a high enough price. Well, no, these toys suck for the most part, because they're not toys, they're just colorful paperweights. This Hawkman comes in a 3-pack with two other lame Hawk-related characters, for a whopping price of $15 or more! Yeah, GI Joes are about the same price, but they come with accessories and are discreetly and bountifully articulated, these figures are no match. Head to ROSS stores and get DCIH 3-packs for $5, no kidding! Hawkman is almost worth that price alone.
Value Score: 6 / 10
70/ 100 - This is a Good Toy
Hawkman flies though the gate just in time to grab a 70. Minor problems are more noticeable on figures at this scale.
-DrNightmare
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